What's Wrong With Getting It Right?

The perils of trying to be perfect
by Alison Bonds Shapiro, M.B.A. in Healing Into Possibility
Originally published online by Psychology Today

From the time I can remember the measurement of “success” was doing whatever it was I was doing “right”. Questions had only one “right” answer and my job was to find that answer and hold onto it. When I was small, the questions were easy. One plus one had a “right” answer.As I grew older the questions grew more complex. Simple answers were hard to come by but “right” answers were still required. I remember learning to take standardized tests. Standardized tests have required answers. But while I was filling in the circle next to the required answer, I often knew full well that if I considered the question more broadly and more seriously the required answer did not make sense. It was too simplistic. Learning to give the required answers on a test is a skill unto itself, often having little to do with accuracy.

The relentless requirement to “get it right” in a world full of complexity is a form of tyranny. And like all tyranny it is merciless. Having to “get it right” presumes that it's both possible and desirable to figure out an ultimate, all-inclusive, and unique solution. And we can't rest until we do. We believe that we have no other viable choice. If we don't "get it right", someone else will beat us to it. And then, heaven forbid, we will be “wrong.”



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